These are serious Actresses!

Hoping to establish themselves as mature actresses and to patch up their friendship, Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Simpson have agreed to appear in The Vagina Dialogues. The new, two-woman play by Harvard dropout Kaavya Viswanathan is scheduled to open on Broadway next summer.

The Vagina Dialogues tells the story of two estranged friends whose vaginas decide to have a heart-to-heart talk in order to bridge the gap between their respective caregivers. Although Ms. Lohan is not shy about stretching her vagina in new directions—witness her role in Prairie Home Vagina—Ms. Simpson was skeptical about the project at first.

"Golly," she said. "I can't even wiggle my ears, let alone, well, you know, make it talk." Neither Ms. Simpson nor Ms. Lohan was troubled by the prospect of being nude on stage for ninety minutes or by having to perform on "those days."

Following rehearsals this fall and winter, The Vagina Dialogues will embark on a novel pre-Broadway run. Instead of opening in theaters in Philadelphia, Boston, or Branson, Missouri, as most plays do, The Vagina Dialogues will be presented at colleges that celebrate V-Day.

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